Till We Meet Again…

This will be my last article.  For the past two years, I’ve been writing about women, men, relationships and family.  I hope that all who read, enjoyed what I had to say, I truly enjoyed writing it.  Throughout this time, most of the things you’ve read, you’ve already known, it’s just that sometimes hearing it from someone else confirms what you’ve already known.  Don’t know if this makes much sense to you.  I encourage you not give up on love or finding that someone in your life.  If a relationship is not working for you, don’t be scared to venture and look for someone else.  I believe that we are all born with a destiny and that there are two paths to take, it’s your choice to decide. 

If you are in a relationship, do special things for the other person that you’ll know he or she will notice. Have passion in your relationship as well as in your life.  How wonderful it is to live the passion of it. 

For relationships that have found love and lost it, how lucky you have been to have experienced it.  For reality is that some of us never find it. 

And for those who are still waiting to find love, don’t get discouraged because it will happen.  When you find someone who loves you for who you are, what an amazing experience you will have.

LIVE LIFE, BE HAPPY, AND ENJOY IT!

When He Disappoints You…

First I’d like to start by saying that while many men may seem ideal after just a few weeks of dating, upon closer inspection, there can be warning signs that you should avoid a relationship with this person. After so much, ‘the we need to communicate talk, because I can’t read your mind.’ The communication should be balanced. And if a man says to you, ‘I’m a grown man and didn’t know I needed to report to you’. OMG…did he just say that, No Way! Whatever happened to some plain old common courtesy?

Second, If you feel that you are over calling or texting, than you probably are. Take a break and see if ‘He’ starts calling and putting an effort. If he doesn’t, Move On Sister! You deserve someone who wants to call you, talk to you and spend time with you.

Don’t let a man become the center of your universe. Apparently it’s a bad thing.

He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not…

You love him, but you spend more time crying than laughing. You’re not getting along with your significant other and yet there’s a day that you do get along; your relationship feels like a rollercoaster ride instead of being in the honey moon stage, why are you still hanging on? In an argument, he’s telling you to leave, and the next day he’s saying that he loves you. How crazy is that? Do you know what century we are living in?

You need someone you can grow with and will make you a better person. Someone who is interested in what you have to give. Someone that will bring the two of you closer together; yet I know that sometimes our greatest difficulty is leaving someone we love.

Love has the ability to hurt when it fails, and it’s hard not to take it personally because it makes you feel like a failure every time you let go of a relationship. Can falling in love be so powerful and infatuating? Is it so powerful that you fall head over heels into an obsession with the other person?

Even if you make mistakes, remember that every life’s experience is a growth opportunity, a lesson learned. Have faith in yourself. Choose to get the most out of what this life has given you, have self respect and dignity. Laugh and cry, grab a box of Kleenex and cry all afternoon if you need to. When you are ready to let go you will, at the end, he will be sorry he lost you.

Remember what an incredible woman you are and don’t forget to dance while your heart heals.

“For some reason I believed that if you fell in love it was a guaranteed thing that your path would cross with his, and I never wondered how if would feel to fall in love with a man whose future just couldn’t include you.”
― Laura Pritchett

The Perfect Man…

Women may dream about finding prince charming, but does he really exist?  Some of us spend our whole lives searching for the perfect man, though each of us have our own ideas of what a perfect man should be or should look like.  Women’s taste changes as we get older and our idea of a ‘perfect man’ could exist for every stage in our lives.

Example:  As a man matures, it’s important for him to be well educated, hard working, as opposed to being an athletic or good looking.  Also someone that is honest and trusting are two important factors along with communication.  So as a woman, what is it exactly that we are searching for?

Do we really need a perfect man or do we just need a special guy who can accept us the way we are and makes us feel special? I know that I am not perfect, I think that none of us are, we should just look for someone who can make us happy.   And if you are with someone, and that person doesn’t make you happy, maybe you just haven’t met him yet.

P.S.

To the one I love, you might not be the ‘Perfect Man’, but you are definitely the perfect man for me.

Love and Loss…

A friend of mine has been struggling lately with her relationship.  A lot goes into a relationship and it’s hard to determine whether to let go or continue holding on.  The end of any relationship is difficult and if it doesn’t work out, the hardest part is coping with the break-up.  You allow people to get close to you; you make them a part of your life and a fear of mixed emotions float through your mind.

It’s hard to lose someone you care about; it’s like losing a part of your life.  And the hardest part is coping with the pain you feel.  If you are angry or hurt, let yourself be angry and hurt, it’s normal.  Though you are missing him/her like crazy, spend time with your family and friends.  Try hard to focus on the present and keep in mind that you are not alone.  Remember that very few people get to know us as we really are.  Keep an open mind and an open heart.

In the words of Alfred Lord Tennyson, “Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all”.

A Gift of Knowledge

For some of us staying single is great time to focus on your career, it’s a great time to mold and shape your life and pursue your dreams.  You will definitely have more time for yourself and appreciate your independence more.  Living the single life gives you the opportunity to discover yourself and figure out what you truly want in a partner.  That does not mean in anyway creating a checklist, Please do not create a checklist, you will never find a person that will fit all your criteria’s from a checklist.  And the last advantage of being single is that it will make you more complete, which is a great card to hold when you decide to enter the dating world.

At the same time, don’t lose the opportunity of finding someone that will fill the inner emptiness and will give you the love you’ve been searching for.  If you’ve found someone that completes you, don’t lose that opportunity.  Find someone that brings out the best you, someone you can trust and that there’s no second guessing.  Have a solid understanding of what a healthy relationship is supposed to be like; have fun and add playfulness to spice the relationship.  And always remember, communication is always the key to any great relationship.

“I no longer believed in the idea of soul mates, or love at first sight. But I was beginning to believe that a very few times in your life, if you were lucky, you might meet someone who was exactly right for you. Not because he was perfect, or because you were, but because your combined flaws were arranged in a way that allowed two separate beings to hinge together.”
― Lisa Kleypas, Blue-Eyed Devil

The Online Dating Game

I have to tell you, the more I see this online dating thing, the more disappointed I get. I think it’s another way for women to torture themselves. It’s not enough that physically dating someone is somewhat difficult, but now online dating is just as difficult. Trying to meet someone in person, and talking to them over the web, trying to figure out if you or they suit you, I can’t imagine anything worse.  Let me rephrase myself, there is worse, and then comes the day that you meet each other, if that day ever comes.  Then you depend on first impressions and you give it thumbs up or thumb down.

Maybe I’m missing something here; let me know if I am.

Why are women given the wrong message?

I love that Jerry Maguire movie when he says to her “you complete me.” Why are we given the wrong message? I think it started with “daddy’s little girl,” where our fathers not only made us feel safe from the world around us, but also made us feel as if they were our protectors. And as we grew up we realized our parents CAN help us, but they CANNOT protect us from the world around us. However, we do hope that someday we will meet our very own prince, the one person that will come to our rescue to save us in our most needed moments.

Or…does it start in pre-school when for the first time a boy calls you a nasty name and you go home crying to mom and she tells you not to pay attention, “that boy probably likes you.”

Then you move on to middle school, if a boy doesn’t talk to you, it’s because he’s shy. And then you jump into high school. If you give a boy your number and he doesn’t call, your girlfriends will say, “it’s probably because he lost it.” Or if he cancels on a date, it’s not about you, “I’m sure he really had a good reason.” Finally, you’ve reached the stage of adulthood and that’s when we learn those famous words that take us through the rest of our years, “Emotionally Unattached.” Are you kidding me? Why have we made up excuses for men all our lives? I certainly would like to know.

Is it hard not to have any more excuses?

You never know where you might find a friend or not…

Haven’t seen an ex-boyfriend in years, and till this day I still have no intentions of seeing him. Recently my air conditioner broke and I’ve been shopping around for an estimate. Somehow, by a mutual friend, the ex-boyfriend found out about my air conditioner and search for prices. When I came home from work my mother asked, “How much did the air conditioner cost?”

“What air conditioner?”

I started walking towards the back yard and there it was. My ex had delivered a new air conditioner unit.

My best friend keeps in touch with her old boyfriends. I never understood why. I’ve never been the type to stay friends with ex-boyfriends. I am definitely a strong believer that if a relationship doesn’t work out while you’re in it, then what’s the point of keeping in touch after it’s over with. It’s like a bad marriage, after it’s over with, unless you have kids together, what’s the purpose of keeping in touch? and really “who cares?”

With the act of kindness that I was just shown, I guess that some relationships might be good to keep. But I have to confess, that after a couple of bad bruises on the ego, his lame excuses that really sucked, and some nights spent eating chocolate mint ice cream, an EX should be crossed out on the list of people worth remembering. I wonder if ex-boyfriends respect the title that they now have.

AND…If and when he calls, sincerely thank him. If he continues to call, turn off your cell phone and start going back into the chocolate mint ice cream you still keep in your refrigerator. After all, you won’t find out later that the chocolate mint ice cream you were having cheated on you.

To my new friend, Opinionated Man

Loved your blog, just loved it.  Especially the one titled “Women are Crazy.”  It made me laugh, which is a good thing.  Though let me clarify a few things for you.  When a woman decides on a topic all by herself, without the opinion of a man, it’s mostly because men usually can’t make up their minds.  Or we know that we will hear those words “Whatever you want honey.”  Which to us means, “We don’t care, just do whatever you want.”

Secondly, when you say to a woman “Absolutely right honey…” now those words are the key to a great marriage.  Why argue? Why would you even consider arguing with your significant other?  I’m pretty sure if you ask any man that has been married over 20 years, he would agree with this.

Lastly, why would a woman even consider talking about a subject that we know nothing about?  I don’t want to be cruel, but really it’s like a bad relationship, “If not interested, NEXT.”

And yes, at the end of the day, women are crazy.  Crazy to meet that perfect guy, crazy to fall in love, crazy to marry him and we definitely want a man to go crazy over us.

p.s.

You are a great writer.